Paradigms of Psychosis

The Storm that Shook Omaha, NE...Literally

2008-07-01T09:31:00.015-06:00

So, it's been a while since I've posted. Partly because I hate looking at my blog, but I'm too lazy/busy to mess with it. It's also due to the fact that I just don't have anything worth saying.

Anyway, the 27th of June, last Friday, Rob and I were at a friend's apartment. We were just about to leave when my friend Chelsey (I was on the phone with her) told me that the storm sirens were going off. We hadn't heard them in the apartment. At first, Rob and I were going to throw caution to the wind and try to make it home as fast as possible, but there was a massive wall cloud just outside Drew's apartment. So we decided to head back inside the building and get to the basement.

I'm glad we did. Soon after we got down there, the winds picked up. I think the news said that they were around 100 mph. Through the doors leading outside the basement, it looked like a mini hurricane.

I'd like to note that someone was looking after us, because when we had decided to leave, we pulled the car out of it's parking space and ended up parking at the opposite end when we decided to stay. After the storm was done, we went outside and saw that where we had been parked, someone else was parked there, and a huge tree branch was on top of it and the car sitting next to it. We were very grateful that it hadn't been our car.

One downside of the storm was that most of Omaha was without power due to trees falling on power lines. And let me tell you, we had some major tree damage.

Here are some photos of the damage on streets surrounding ours (our street had no tree damage) that were taken by Rob.

We were lucky to get our power back the next morning. Certain parts of Omaha are still without power and might be so for a while.

New Year's Resolution

2008-01-03T19:06:00.000-06:00

This year I want to stay focused on the things that need to be done, and to shrug off the petty bullshit that accompanies everyday life.

That pretty much sums it up.

(*Side note - I'm really proud of my mom. She took her Compass Test to get into Iowa Western Community College today, and she passed. She'll begin her prerequisites for nursing on the 14th of this month.)

So, winter break was a blast. I spent a few days before and after my birthday with Rob and Chelsey, and they were filled with lots of laughter, late nights, and Starbucks - I love you guys.

Adventures in Omaha

2007-09-25T18:13:00.000-06:00

Rob and I spent the weekend in Omaha, hanging out with his dad. He picked us up on Friday and we went to Sullivan's in the Old Market with the intentions of having dinner, but no one was really hungry. So we all just ordered drinks and had some appetizers, then Rob drove us back to his dad's apartment. On the way back, Rob almost hit a woman. Mind you, he was driving around the Old Market, and it was only his second time driving in that area and he was kind of flustered.

Saturday we got up at around ten and went to Village Inn for breakfast. I had an egg and bacon sandwich and hash browns - it was delicious. After that, we went back to the apartment and it was around one o'clock. Plagued by lethargy, we napped for a while. We were supposed to meet up with a friend of Rob's from middle school, Brielle, sometime after three. So, after waking up at around 3:3o, we called her up, and she came over at about four. We hung out at her apartment for a while, although we had intentions of going somewhere and doing something. It soon got to be about seven, and Rob's dad called and asked if we wanted to go have dinner somewhere in the Old Market. So we went and had sushi (my first time ever trying it), and I also tried sake (a Japanese rice wine), which is pretty good. Then went to Stadium Club which has THE BEST burgers ever. We got back to the apartment at around eleven, and Brielle left for home.

Sunday, we came back to my house, and Drew came to pick up Rob at around 10:30 pm.

We would have gotten pictures, but Rob forgot his camera. Oh well, maybe next time.

Underage Drinkers

2007-09-17T17:34:00.000-06:00

It's pretty much a given that teenagers are going to drink alcohol. No one's naive enough to believe (at least, I don't think) that we don't break that law. Of course, as long as one doesn't get caught, it's easy enough to get around.

My rant is not centered around the fact that teenagers consume alcohol, it's centered around the fact that they plaster photos all over the Internet as if to say, "Look at me! I'm breaking the law! Aren't I cool?" Um, no. You're not. For one, you and your dumb-ass friends aren't the only ones who drink illegally. It's been going on practically since the law was passed. For two, ANYONE can look at your profiles and make judgments about you. For example, employers can look at your profile and decide that they don't want you working for them. How cool will you look then?

My advice is this: if you want to drink with your friends and snap some photos to remember the good times, keep them between you and your friends to laugh about later. Because the reality is, no one else cares.

Some Changes

2007-08-19T08:24:00.000-06:00

As you can see, there have been some changes made to my blog. It's still the same Blogger template I had before, but Rob made some changes to it. He put the sidebar on the left, and made it somewhat smaller, and he put my music play list in there. I don't know why I had the idea of putting it at the top. That just looked tacky. Anyway, I changed the colors myself, but I still need Rob to change, or tell me how to change, that blue strip dividing the sidebar from the main part.

I'm not in the mood...parents, take care of your kids.

2007-06-13T22:17:00.001-06:00

I don't like hyper-active little kids. I especially don't like the ones that are always hanging around my sister when their mothers don't feel the need to take responsibility for them.

They thrust them upon her, hoping to take advantage of the fact that she is their babysitter, and she must want to be around them all the time. They are good friends with our parents, another plus for them. They want some alone time, they send them to Amber. They tell themselves that they don't have to pay her because she's not actually babysitting...no, not really...because they are technically there.

Well, not only does Amber not want to play 24-hour babysitter, I don't like listening to them yell and scream when I'm trying to watch So You Think You Can Dance?, and I don't want them in our room touching my stuff.

I don't trust them not to, and I don't trust my sister to keep them from doing so. Wanna know why? I went in my room to get something, and my crocheted blanket that my grandmother so lovingly made for me was on the floor, and it had cracker crumbs on it! Not to mention sunflower seeds were strewn about the floor and I know damned well that she won't vacuum them up. I'll have to do that.

I flat-out refuse to be taken advantage of. Which is why I'm glad they don't like me as much as they like her.

Thank God for small blessings.

Working Girl

2007-06-12T20:40:00.000-06:00

Yup, it's true. I started working at Dave's Old Home Cafe here in town today.

First day of work at the cafe was tiring. Got there at 3, clocked out at 8:30. My back hurts, and the Ibuprofen isn't working fast enough. I feel like dropping down to the ground and not getting back up again. Although it might not feel good once I DO get back up.

Over all, though, it was a pretty easy day. During the week it isn't so busy, so I wasn't all that overwhelmed. I have a lot of stuff to remember, though. I probably have to go in this weekend and train some more. I think that I might actually like working there.

Flyleaf!...and then some.

2007-06-05T22:19:00.000-06:00

May 25, there was a Flyleaf concert at Sokol Auditorium in Omaha, NE. I spent the weekend at Chelsey's, and as usual, it had been at least a month since I had seen her. So, I was happy that I got to spend some time with her. I also got to see some other friends, as well as Rob and Drew, and on Saturday Chelsey, Rob, Drew, Stephanie, Jackie, Jessica R., and I went and saw Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End.

The Flyleaf concert, which also consisted of Resident Hero, Sick Puppies, and Kill Hannah was awesome...and deafening. But what concert isn't? Anyway Chelsey, Stephanie, Sarah, and I all went together. Chelsey and I didn't know who Resident Hero was, and Sick Puppies and Kill Hannah were only slightly entertaining. We were glad that Flyleaf was last, but we were anxious for the other bands to get done and over with. During the first three bands, Chelsey and I managed to work our way to the front and to keep our spot for a while. It was a struggle, believe me. Especially when Kill Hannah came out. The crowd went into crazy-psycho-killer mode. I probably got a work-out pushing people out of the way. The only reason Chelsey and I stayed together was because we held hands and wouldn't let go for anything. We regretted not waiting until Flyleaf to move to the front, though, because soon after they came out, we moved back a little bit because we were just too drained to fight anymore. When we moved back we met up with Steph again, but not with Sarah. Further back, the crowd wasn't as pushy, so we just rocked out for the remainder of the concert. When "There For You" came on, Chelsey started crying, because it's our song. We sang along at the top of our lungs for most of their songs. Afterward, we waited outside Sokol Auditorium for Sarah's mom, as we came down from our adrenaline rushes.

This is me, Chelsey, and Steph at Chelsey's house after the concert:

We be sexy bitches.

Anyway, the pirates movie was awesome, enough said about that.

In other news...

I desperately want a driving license. Unfortunately, in Iowa you have to take Driver's Ed in order to get one before you're 18. Lame, huh? Otherwise I'd get it some time this summer. I would have taken Driver's Ed sooner, but neither of my parents want to let me drive.

I'm a good driver, dammit! What's sad is that a friend of my parents' trusts me to drive his truck by myself. Just in town to the store, of course. I only have my permit and I wouldn't want to get caught. Anyway, whether I have to get someone else to let me practice driving with their vehicle, I'm taking Driver's Ed next school year.

Rob's Graduation and Stuff

2007-05-22T17:28:00.000-06:00

My life has been crazy, lately. Like a roller coaster. I've had some ups, and plenty of downs. Mostly, it's been moving by super quickly. School is finally out, but I can't say I'm excited for the summer. I'm actually anxious for my senior year and I can't wait to go to college. I plan on taking the ACT in October. The last day of school I checked out an ACT prep book from the school library and I'm going to study it this summer.

So, Rob is officially out of high school, and living with a good friend of ours, Drew. They've been best friends since they were wee little kids. Anyway, I spent graduation weekend at his house, and we went to Marae's graduation party on Saturday. It was fun. Marae, Stephanie and I sang karaoke and sucked. We almost got stranded there because at the last minute his mother decided she couldn't come pick us up. Luckily, Alex Nihsen's dad happened to be at Marae's party and was going to Logan for another grad party, so he gave us a ride to James' (Rob's brother) graduation party at the Logan Community Center.

Ahaha, that was fun. Rob sang karaoke first with Xhaz (pronounced "Chaz")and they sang "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey. Then he sang with Kevin and they sang "I Want It That Way" by the Backstreet Boys. They fucked the songs up on purpose, singing very loudly and very off-key. We did a lot of dancing, Rob dancing the same way the entire time. It was kind of cute, and made me and a bunch of others laugh.

When "Ohio Is For Lovers" by Hawthorne Heights came on, a group of Rob's and James' friends from Logan and myself formed a mini mosh pit and started jumping and pushing into each other when the chorus came on. I'm laughing as I type this. It was pretty comical because you don't mosh to Hawthorne Heights.

The next day was Rob's graduation, and it was unreal seeing him in his gown, cap and tassel. I was very proud of him. I am proud of him.

Here are some pictures taken with Rob's camera:

Me, his sister Erica, his mother, his brother James, and his father. Rob is obviously down in front.

Drew, Rob, and Drew's dad.

Robert and me.

It's about time...

2007-04-01T09:16:00.000-06:00

After three long agonizing years, we're getting the fuck out of Karen's house. It might actually be within the week. We've been putting it off, hoping that my dad would have found a job by now, but we can't wait any longer. We can't live the way we are living. We can't live with her always bitching at everything we do. She's made it quite clear that the only reason we moved up here was to take care of her. She's invading our lives. She's disrespectful to my mom and dad, and she's disrespectful to my sister and me.

Nothing we do is ever good enough, but we bend over backwards for her. My mom works 12-hour shifts at a nursing home. She's trying her best to make enough money to keep her satisfied because my dad won't get over himself and go get a fucking job. But Karen bitches that she isn't home enough to clean the house and to basically be there to take care of her. Karen only works 6-hour shifts at a fucking bank that hardly gets anybody, and she comes home and sits at her computer all damned day. But it's always my mom who never does enough. Karen is a lazy bitch, and once we move, I want nothing to do with her. I'm really beginning to not care if she's left all alone. She's made it clear that all we do is disappoint her.

The line between dislike and hate is beginning to blur.

Funny Images

2007-04-01T09:02:00.000-06:00

I was bored, so I was browsing the web and found some pretty funny images that I though I'd share.

--Marae and I have this fantasy about becoming a Pussycat Doll. However, reality hit us and we figured we aren't sexy enough.

--I like pancakes too...let's be friends!

--This reminds me of yesterday in Speech class. Nate Cartmill was trying to say that people are giving three-year-olds marijuana.

--That's fucked up...

Spring has sprung.

2007-03-13T15:54:00.000-06:00

Yup. It's here. Whether you like it or not, winter is pretty much over. I, for one, am glad for that. It got up to 80 degrees today. This bout of warm weather has me in unusually high spirits.

I just love spring. It brings back memories of when I was younger, more carefree. Nowadays life just seems to pass by in a blur, and I rarely have time to stop and really appreciate anything.

On a different note...

I entered a poem of mine into a contest. For those of you who check my devART account, it's the one titled Narcissus. For my creative writing class we are required to enter either an essay or a poetry contest...by Friday. I lucked out and had a poem already written, and one that I am particularly proud of.

If you don't check my devART site, the poem goes like this:

Take, take, take.
You give nothing in return.
Fake, fake, fake.
The truth you twist and turn.
Your self-indulgence never ceases;
The ones you love you'll tear to pieces.

It's a pretty short poem, but I feel that it's pretty good.

That's all I have to say for right now.

~Jess

Intro

2007-03-04T14:44:00.000-06:00

After much urging from my boyfriend Rob, I got myself a Blogger. Though not begrudgingly. I've wanted a place to write down (er...type) my thoughts for a while now. Myspace or Bebo won't cut it. They pretty much suck for that sort of thing. DeviantART isn't the place either, only because not everyone has one of those. Plus, I can customize the shit out of this thing. It's something that's wholly mine.

I realize that this place looks shabby and needs quite a bit of work.

I love to write. It's like a drug for me. I don't do much fiction anymore, but I like to write about my opinions on certain topics.

I also read a lot. Fantasy and horror are probably my favorite genres of books, but I'm open to other genres.

I'm stubborn, possessive, and somewhat obsessive-compulsive.

I can't tolerate double standards, racism, sexism, and homophobia.

I am loyal to my close friends. I would die for them.

That's all I can come up with right now. Want to know more? Ask. I might tell you.

By the way, I am Jess.